Skip to main content

Failing Over & Over. Is There Hope?

 I'm inside my car as it is parked in the parking lot of my church. I told my sister and brother to go ahead while I stay behind . I decided to stay in the car to write this...

Whatever it is that I am writing, not really sure yet.. But let's see where this takes me yeah? 

My Prayer Last night: 

" Dear God, 
I'm a continued mess & failure. I haven't achieved anything, I'm flunking every class. I'm literally just taking up space at home and I have no idea what my purpose is. I'm going to sleep, Please. Do. Not. Wake. Me. Up." 

Not the most happiest prayer... 

So what do you do when you feel like a continued failure? When it is coming to the point where your parents are saying...

"You are disgracing the family" 
"I'm really disappointed in you" 
"What kind of person are you" 
" You are just taken up space" 
" Why don't you have common sense?" 
"You haven't achieved anything" 

I do not know, I feel like I am suppose to have some type of brilliant, eye opening response.. But all I can say is if you prayed a prayer similar to what I prayed last night and you are still here, well then... You must still have a purpose and I truly believe God is not finished with us yet. 

For the people who are in university and still struggling with grades or maybe you have forgotten why you are pursuing that dream career you always wanted but with the slightest fear that you might just drop out... Stay. 

There is always a reason for why someone is continuously getting the same unsettling results in any situation.

 So Breathe. Stay Alive. Retrace & figure out the habits that are slowing you down. You are going to get fusterated in the process of changing.. Very frustrated with yourself. And people the people closest to you might get fusterated with you too because they may not be seeing changes right away like they'd like too. But take it step by step, the progress you want will come.

 You do have something valuable to contribute to this world, if you stick around long enough you will find it. 

I'm literally talking to myself as I write this, I guess it's just a matter of me believing it for myself..

Do you believe it for your own self? 

Nikki O. 


  1. Awww, I'm sorry you're feeling so down on yourself! All I can tell you is something my dad always says to me: 'no one is a failure who has friends.' It's a Wonderful Life is his favorite movie 😂. But it's true: you matter to the people that love you not because of what you do, but because of who you are.


  2. Thank you so much Emily I really needed to hear that! 😁

  3. Such a lovely post! Wish you all the best :)

  4. This is a very good way of looking at things. God has a plan and a purpose for us all, even though it might not be an obvious one. You've touched my life and I'm very glad you woke up. Xx

    Tania | When Tania Talks

    1. I really appreciate this comment Tania, thank you so much! :)

      Nikki O.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Don't Let Fear Stop You From Living"

"Don't Let Fear Stop You From Living"
"Don't Let Fear Stop You From Living" 
"Don't Let Fear Stop You From Living" 

Someone retweeted this quote on twitter and I immediately opened my computer to start writing. I typed it out like three times because it really stood out to me. I have been thinking a lot about the concept of fear lately, especially with all the chaos going on in our world today. After the unfortunate event at Manchester I knew that I wanted to write a post revolving around fear because lets be honest I and I am pretty sure everyone reading this is or has been carrying a inner feeling of fear in their spirit.

What thing/s are you scared of at the moment? Maybe school, losing friends, the future, death, violence, making sacrifices, new job, losing a job, the list can go on. I think so many times we are focused on putting on this face as if we are invincible and have tough skin that we totally forget that hey, you are human and it i…

To The Student Who Is Taking Longer Than Four Years To Graduate...

I have not written a college related post in a long time so I figured why not, especially since this particular one has been on my mind lately. As it seems a lot of people have graduated this month I want to start by saying CONGRATS! to you all. It has been so exciting to hear about all of your post college grad life and your plans for the future.

With that being said, I want to speak in particularly to the student who has not graduated yet, maybe you have one more year and you will not be graduating in that expected four year mark.. or maybe you are still in community college and feel stuck among the waiting lists and endless GE requirements. I'm writing to that student who is scrolling through Instagram looking at all those grad photos of your classmates from high school and your thinking "that could of been me" "that should of been me" "Maybe if I had.." " Maybe I should of.." I want you to pause with those thoughts and the scrolling and …

Four of My Favorite Bible Verses ( Guest Post By Airriaunte)

Hey Friends, I have a special post for you today! In this blogging community I have been lucky enough to connect with fellow bloggers who share the same Christian faith. With that being said I was more than happy to collab with Airriaunte from the blog CoffeeWithTae and have her share four bible verses that has convicted her. I hope this blesses you!

Please read more about Tae after the post below! If you want to read about My favorite bible verses click HERE

Hi! My name is Airriaunte most (all) of my friends call me Tae! As Im sure you already know Nikki and I are doing a collab of some bible verses that mean a lot to us! So here are the four from me!

Galatians 4: 1-71 I’m saying that as long as the heirs are minors, they are no different from slaves, though they really are the owners of everything. 2 However, they are placed under trustees and guardians until the date set by the parents. 3 In the same way, when we were minors, we were also enslaved by this world’s system. 4 But whe…